| (no subject) |
[Feb. 17th, 2007|11:15 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  tired | ] |
| [ | music |
| | fall out boy | ] |
so today has been the most drama filled day of my life.
mainly because of my friend.
she had a really rough day...people ignored her...her boyfriend forgot they were hanging out today...and other things that happened in the past.
i mean everything possible...she was spazzing out about. nothing i could do...she just needed to vent...so i let her vent. and she was calm for about 2 hours or so then she goes into this state where she doesnt care about anything at all. and i dont know what to do anymore. i am literally stuck...i cannot pull her out of her misery this time...i just cant. and i feel really bad because she has lost 3 of the most important people in her life....and i feel soooooo fucking bad for her. i just feel lost. and im really tired and being lost/tired at the sametime is not a good combination ill tell you that much.
so really the only thing that is keeping me sane at the momment is writing and listening to fall out boy...because those are the only two things that help. besides friends but really...i dont know what to talk about with them so i write and writing helps. i was sooo hot headed when i was begining to write this...now it feels like i can actually breathe. its a good feeling really. *sigh* okay now for something totally different.
so i go my hair cut today. i like it..not the best...but i like it nontheless.
another thing.
the walters basically own my life at this point.
you know who you are. and i love you all so fucking much.
time for another restless night and the dark depths of my slumber tonight
signout buckaroo.
xoxo |
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| uggghhh.... |
[Sep. 21st, 2006|10:37 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  stressed | ] |
| [ | music |
| | i write sins not tragidies | ] |
hey---she hates me right now but you know shes talking to me...and yeah we wrote a note today and what not, uhm her mom called me last night and we talked for about 10 min or so about the situation. she says that her mom cares more about me than her, now you she was she doesnt get is that her mom does care she just doesnt know how to show it...
ill talk later i g2g
*hugs*
<3 <3 |
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|
| at school again... |
[Sep. 20th, 2006|10:15 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | stressed | ] |
yeah so i have to change my project....im not allowed to use caffiene on humans....wtf. like im gunna kill them. yeah okay...
but the plus side to it is that i have another week to work on my paper so its all good.
im really bored actually. i need find information on different types of music and information on humans memory..b-o-r-i-n-g and i dont want to do it. this prject takes like the whole school year too...i did it last year. its fucking mandatory its worth moe than half our grade for the year. which sucks so i cant slack off...not that i do im just saying.
ugghhh meg i need to talk to you. not having a good day...she showed up at school but yeah....i asked her if she was okay and what not but shes like i dont know...so yeah...i dont know whats wrong at all i hardly slept last night, which sucks cuz im getting sick now. -_- i hate drama. and i have more drama than this im so stressed out... not fun. but you know what in baking today i made chocolate chip cookies =D that was pretty exciting. hehe and my best friend was there, and made them with me, and she was comforting me the whole time.. and it sucks that shes not in my homeroom class...so yeah...and danielle is which is seriously hard, and i have people coming up to me asking me whats wrong and they want to know everything but i dont know if i should tell them anything its really hard...ugh.
i hope youre okay. 6 more days. =D =D i cannot wait. hehe its going to be big so what if its not a big one my best friends dont turn 19 everyday you know (i know i said that before). okay well the teacher is floating around so im gunna go.
*hugs* *muah*
ily!! |
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| boardie edition. staring Meg. =D |
[Sep. 19th, 2006|09:12 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
hmmmm unless you are a boardie you have no idea who i am about to write about. but w.e shes one of my best friends so she deserves to be written about. =)
Meg's birthday is 7 days. September 26. shes gunna be 19
and thats a big thing. maybe not to her but to me it is.
its not everyday my friends turn 19, so im gunna do it off big. =) im not giving anything off on here cuz she can read it (right meg?)
She has written this amazing story on her livejournal page. its just...wow. i love it. i really do.
and since i dont have anything better to say im gunna start writing from the heart. (hah shut up)
hmmm lets see how far back i can remember....back in the middle oj july (July 18) i became a boardie. most likely one of the best things i have ever done.
1. because i have met some of the greatest people i would have neevr thought i would meet.
2. the boardies make me feel like i belong, that im at home, that there is not other place in the world than being there with them.
3. they are so comforting and understanding, and at least try to help you, with problems that you most likely couldnt go to any of your friends for or is about your friends.
4. it gave me more people to talk to through the summer.
even though meg was not the first person i met on the boards, she was one of the first people that i talked to, and got to know. and she has been with me ever since then.
Id have to say that she and my other good boardie friend Gabbie made this summer amazing, one of the best summers that i have ahad in a long time.
It was meg who stayed up with me until 7 or 8 in the morning. it was meg who was always there to talk, it was meg who got me into fan fic, and is now hooked on it (thanks btw), its meg who is just amazing and every way possible. i dont know if i wouldve made it through this summer without her. shes just ahhh indescribable.
she makes me feel like i can act like myself (i was afraid to at first) but it grew on me.
i love you meg. there is so much more to be put down. i dont know what else. but there is more.
thank you for everything. *hugs* |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 18th, 2006|12:16 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  giggly | ] |
| [ | music |
| | london bridge - fergie | ] |
L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that adore
and love is all that I can give to you
love is more than just a game for two
two in love can make it
take my heart and please don't break it
love was made for me and you
^^^i love that song: L-O-V-E by Nat King Cole
Meg's birthday is in 9 days.
thats pretty darn exciting for me.
i have a few plans up my sleeves not that im gunna tell anyone =)
*reads more fan fic*
if you dont know what that is apparently you dont get out too often. or maybe you do and its me who needs to get out more...w.e. i still go with what i said first.
=) |
|
|
| at school.... |
[Sep. 14th, 2006|10:07 am] |
hey guys....im at school doing science. its pretty boring as hell. im searching through photobucket. =) hehe
we have a paper due on the 25 of this month. not cool. bitch.
we have to go in like a min. i figured id update. hah.
~car~
<3 |
|
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| omg megs story is great!!! |
[Aug. 7th, 2006|08:53 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | rooftops by lostprophets | ] |
omg is you dont know who meg is
then youre missing out
she has the best story that i have read
omg your amazingly awesome!!!!
AHHHHH must have more!!!!
hahaha
ily.
well i was supposed to get an iPod today
but i didnt.. *sigh*
hehe im going home in two days.
i cannot WAIT to see my friends
hehe
the boardies pwn like woah
they rock my socks
best one are in the
*Team assage and free crack(formerly known as "Fall Out Boy As Pirates?")* hehehe i <3 them all sooo fucking much
peace. |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 21st, 2006|12:48 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  hyper | ] |
today is my birthday
i have nothing to do at all
don't push me the way i've pushed you.
don't pray for me the way i've prayed for you.
don't tell me the way i tell you.
don't think i'm going to love you forever.
don't think i'm going to stay with you always.
don't tell the world you crash;
to shatter like i said;
because you don't need it.
look at you, with you're steady attention
look at you, with your heart of gold.
pure with virtue.
look at me,alone and crying.
and look at me, sitting in that corner
and look at me, crying over my broken locket
with that same picture of you in it.
with the picture that draws every memory out.
with that same smile you wore when you met me
with your face
with my luck
it was all fake.
and now look.
look at what we've done.
you say it's me
i say it's you
but which one is true?
you left me
now leave me again.
don't smile ever again.
don't scatter my mind like i did yours
don't make me weak in the knees
like i made you.
don't make me hate you.
like you hated me.
....isnt that cute....yeah sure... |
|
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 13th, 2006|10:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | sleepy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | afi | ] |
im going to six flags tomorrow..its going to be so effing fun!!!
my birthday is next week how exciting!!!
this is for m best friend in the world. ilysm.
you are that kind of a jewel to me,
who is as precious as the,
diamond which sinked,
when the titanic sanked.
you are that kind of a star,
that always sparkles and,
looks different from others.
you are that star with whom,
i sometimes talk,
when i am sad.
you are that talking picture to me,
with whom i talk,
when i fell awkward to say,
something in front of you.
you are that friend to me,
to the destiny has forgot to give me as,
A SISTER.
you are like a beautiful rainbow to me,
who makes me smile,
when i've been through a storm.
you are not less than,
a comic character,
whom i love a lot and,
who makes me fell happy and laugh.
you are the one who makes me feel that,
i am someone and,
i have cetain duties to carry on.
you are like an inspiration to me,
when i've lost all hopes,
and you bring out a world inside of me,
that i never knew i had.
you are the one friend,
for whom i would,
like to take millions of births,
to thank you,
for what you have done for me-----from the begining to the end.
you are the friend,
infront of whom,
i never make excuses,
and never tells lies.
because you know me,
better than anyone would ever had.
you know me by my faults and demerits,
rather than my,
few good points.
you are a friend,
who is always close to me,
on whom i can always count on,
who multiplies my JOYS and SORROWS,
by a smile and a laugh.
you are a friend,
who knows what i am thinking.
What my likes and dislike are,
what i wished to be,
and that always think good of me.
you are like a candle,
who's flame glows brighter,
at the time of darkness.
you are a friend,
with whom i celebrate,
the happiness you give to me,
with whom i would like to make,
everyday of my life-----A HOLIDAY,
and want to celebrate it as never before.
you are a friend,
who always forgives me,
even though when i am wrong.
you are friend,
who is always there,
and,
will be always there,
in my life, no matter what.
and not like the waves upon the sand,
day and night.
YOU and I are something else,
like the permanent things,
there fatty me,
or my smeely socks,
which never goes away.
you are a friend,
who will accompany me,
to the end,
no matter what!
you are a friend,
to whom i would like,
to give one gift,
THE ABILITY TO SEE YOURSELF,
as the others do.
because except this,
i don't have he ther precious gift for you.
you are a friend,
to whom,
i hate to say GOOD BYE,
because i need you and,
want you to be always,
near and closer to me.
each day spent with you is better than the last.
and my first day spent with you was the best day of my life.
you are the friend,
who thinks i am a good egg,
even though you know,
i am slightly cracked.
you are a friend,
who has given me everything.
from a good advice,
to a pep talk,
when i was sad.
you are the reason,
for my smile.
you are the reason,
for my sucess.
you are the reason,
for my good behavior with others.
you are the reason,
for everything good in me.
you are a friend,
i sometimes share a silence,
yet feel so comfortable.
you are a friend,
who never let me realized,
that i am not in a level with you,
that i don't deserve you,
that i am not as good and as great as you are,
and that,
as beautiful and as nice by heart as you.
you never looked down upon me but ,
always encouraged me.
to have a friend like you,
TINNY,
is my highest delight of my life.
you are a friend,
that provides me with strength,
when i need the most.
i value you more than i value my life.
so, when i say, YOU ARE MY FRIEND, it's just means,
YOU ARE MY LIFE.
Now we are a kind of friends,
who have shared,
so much laughter,
so many tears.
i know,
we are not sister by birth,
but sisters,
whom destiny has forgot to give us,
and there's something,
that puts us together by hearts.
I THANK YOU for all the,
kindness, honesty, warmth and goodness,
you have shown to me. |
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